POST-ATHEIST

The Unauthorized Chuy's Creamy Jalapeno Dip

• 16 oz. (or 24, it matters little) sour cream
  
• 1 packet of Hidden Valley Ranch Dip Mix powder
  
• 1 handful cilantro leaves (more or less to taste)
  
• 3/4 cup pickled jalapeno slices (more or less to taste)

Put the ingredients in a blender (or use a nifty hand blender) and blend until smooth. Eat immediately or, even better, chill for a few hours letting the flavors meld.

HATCH GREEN CHILI SALSA

(Yield: 11/2 quarts)

2 quarts water

1/2 pound fresh tomatillos (see cook's notes)

1/2 pound fresh serrano chili peppers (see cook's notes)

1 pound roasted Sandia green chili peppers

1/3 bunch cilantro

3 medium cloves garlic, peeled

1 medium white onion, peeled and diced

2 tablespoons salt

2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lime juice

DCook's note: Tomatillos look like small green tomatoes with a papery, round husk. To adjust the heat of the salsa, use more or fewer serrano chilies, as desired.

1. Place water in large pot and add tomatillos, serrano chilies, Sandia chilies, cilantro, garlic and onion. Bring to boil and simmer for 30 minutes.

2. Strain liquid into a container and place solid ingredients in blender. (You may have to work in batches.) Add 1/2 of the strained liquid to blender and blend until smooth.

3. Add lime juice and salt and blend 30 seconds. Chill before serving.

it's 5:47 in the morning. i've been up for about three hours. and yes, my life and the hours i keep are a little nuts. i'm desperately craving a bowl of chili right now.


i miss publishing. i miss having time. i feel like some kind of rejected deist: i helped give birth to a company that is flourishing outside my purview.

my cat is dead.

i'm sick of hearing about jesus being the final signified. i'm frustrated that exactly two of my peers would even know what that last sentence means.


but.

i am encouraged that my professors would. do. i don't think i can communicate the joy that i experience when a prof. uses a word like "agency" or includes something from dewey or heidegger's work in a lecture.

the bar is set high. i don't have time to feel sorry for myself.

(my place is back there to the right over the garage)















the view from my front door. i sit here in the mornings: read, sip tea.

















the rest are pictures of my house in mild disarray... i've been studying like crazy.

the day is tender.

maybe it's because i'm reading and writing about the holocaust (simon wiesenthal's work is amazing). maybe it's because i spent the morning helping the family prepare for a funeral service (a close family friend has passed away after an epic struggle with cancer).

this morning my 11-year-old broke down while running his half-mile at the gym. he doesn't understand death any more than i do.

i don't know a whole lot, folks. i do know that new mexico is around the corner. i know that there is some positive influence, or at least some sort of influence, that i have on the kids.

this morning, through tears, ch. said "thank you for being you."

all i had in the car: brown taco bell napkins.

we both needed them.

last night my 11-year-old, finally tucked into bed around 8:45 says his goodnights and sleepily asks me "how's greek treating you, shan?"

for the first time i really love the villa. perhaps it's the result of the aftermath of todays rain, or last night's delicious dinner (vegetable skewers, foccacia).

today i have the windows open, allowing light and cool air, the sound of steady patter of water on pavement to enter.

i'm reading matthew. drinking tea from my favorite mug.


but beringer is missing (since wednesday). i don't care how you spin it -- it's just not okay. but what is these days? pessimistic much, shan?


listening to waltzing alone by the guggenheim grotto. it's one of those albums that you have to 1. be in the right mood for and 2. give a few listens so that it can grow on you.

----

today i'm thankful for alexis and michael turner for accompanying me to an iraq war protest some years ago. and to jen spillane for being a lovely, inspiring roommate for two years. and to a gentleman at john eagle honda for doing all in his power to help me get my car fixed.

off to work,

sh-n