Friday, August 31, 2007 


this is.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007 

my good sweet lord, greek is difficult already. i'm not even at kindergarten level -- i'm basically a 1-year-old who has a vocabulary of "no" and "and" and "logos." baby steps, no?

my kids had a great first day of school. my kitchen is clean. i made tacos around 9:30 last night. i awoke today at fifteen till five; i've been studying greek and have not even read the news as is my morning custom, though i did catch a bit on npr.

and hey: it's 6:14AM and i have managed to water the plants, study greek, wipe down the counters, and prepare for a day of work. what have you done?

discount tire: please do not let me down. i need a new tire and alignment and i would like to not spend the very little $ that i currently have. amen.


i miss bran, and sue, and jus(x2) and jill, and ber and berk. cinder and auggie are lovely pets, and it's fascinating to watch them as they do certainly have different personalities, but fish aren't cats. i realize that that last statement is a fairly obvious one.

this is the life i have chosen. academic rigor. fish. children and a dog. growth.

cats live a long time. perhaps we may reunite after i finish this degree. the future is wide open, and while there are certainly outside forces, much depends on my decisions.

i think i've done a good job so far.

Sunday, August 26, 2007 

sunday, sunday

going to church this morning.

ran for 20 minutes. spent a few hours reading.

there is some merit in waking at 5AM, though i begin to tap out around 9 in the evening.

did i mention how good it is to be in school again?

today: reading. brief run. reading. bath. green tea with mint. church. brunch. blue house. reading. greek (hopefully soon to be "reading greek"). mop. take out trash. reading. maybe fix printer. single mexican beer with second attempt at creating a palatable quesadilla. reading. bath. maybe tune guitar.


Saturday, August 25, 2007 

bright saturday

the first week of class was glorious. i already have an incredible amount of homework.

i love it.

i have to work in about an hour. just now my 9 year-old called from next door. "shan! what do i need to do this morning?"

"um, get dressed and make your bed?"



hal is fixed. my cats are doing well at UM's place in houston. i'm organized. i know the greek alphabet. my fish are content (have you ever seen one who is not?)

i'm in a choir! i didn't even have to become a gay man (please forgive the reference to a private joke -- at one point leah and i wanted to join a choir and the only open one we could find was for gay men uptown.) we rehearse and sing in what is quite possibly the most aurally-pleasing space i have occupied.

check these guys out:



in the midst of sorrow, i am reminded how life can be good.

i've been missing papa acutely. i wish he was around; we could discuss what i've been reading/learning. while sitting in chapel between two baritones (who know how to harmonize!) i am shaken, stirred by the memory of singing next to him in church. he's been in my dreams lately: feeding goats, giving me driving lessons (yep: i'm 14 again in pantyhose and a daisy-pattern church dress, pressing the gas with my right foot (clad in a white flat) in the old red and white ford truck,) and the oranges, all the oranges he peeled for me that we would share in the evenings, the living room lit by the news on the television.


i think that's it for now. time to dress, load the dishwasher and head to work. my kids made their own sims and they are eager to force them to socialize and do chores.

Monday, August 20, 2007 

on the verge, the eve of something great

answering the question of why i'm pursuing a masters in theology at orientation was like trying to explain my tattoo at a bar.

some might think that a more appropriate course of study for me would be philosophy. i can understand that assessment. that said, one cannot discount contingencies both personal and social in regard to theology (and some contingencies such as location, vocation, community, etc.)

i feel hopeful. a little saucy. that tinge of anticipation that punctuated so many moments in the loft, the week a book hit the shelves, the first day at a job... i near feel like doing the caughey man dance to wilco with abandon.

i feel like myself again.

all i need is something to look forward to.

come talk to me in a month when i'm struggling with greek.

i can't wait, but i'm enjoying the simplicity of the unknown that crafts my solitary night in the villa. it's time to put on a cd. time to feed the fish. time to pour a glass of wine and take a bath.

things are good, folks.

class. tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007 

next up...

spinach pasta from scratch (i still haven't used the pasta machine!); i'm thinking linguine with alfredo (from scratch, of course) topped with asparagus, artichoke hearts and maybe a little tomato and red pepper for color.

light salad.

pinot noir and a tall glass of chilled water with lemon.

i know, i know: i'm still in the italian phase. but that just sounds delightful at the moment....

Saturday, August 11, 2007 

a take on the game of life, courtesy of a nine-year-old

(as she is convincing me to play)

it's got appliances and expectations! it's cool!