i am still here.
in this, the summer of my lost year, sitting on the couch at work exhausted while the young teenager plays with his new cell phone, i am reminded of the glass half full take on the troubles my health has brought this direction.
and later tonight? spinach and mushroom enchiladas with mole sauce along with roasted corn on the cobb and chile lime butter.
my last few blog posts (since the first hospitalization in february) have a forced quality, as though i'm trying to conjure up hope.
that's okay. despair is in such ample supply and so damned accessible. i accept this season. sometimes i'm even at peace with the disappointment, suffering, and blows both financial and academic.
when i look in the mirror to brush my teeth or comb my hair, a thirty-year-old looks back solemnly.